leeoman
New Member
Posts โข 595
Likes โข 126
October 2007
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Spreading sum Chrimbo cheer... free ltd ed cards, by leeoman on Dec 15, 2009 14:33:58 GMT 1, Wish my Christmas cards looked that good AP!!
Wish my Christmas cards looked that good AP!!
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webby
New Member
Posts โข 136
Likes โข 0
February 2008
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Spreading sum Chrimbo cheer... free ltd ed cards, by webby on Dec 15, 2009 14:39:05 GMT 1, Hey Ap, love your work, and i am not being a lick, here is my hotel joke/wit: An engineer, physicist & mathematician in a hotel An engineer, a physicist and a mathematician are staying in a hotel.
The engineer wakes up and smells smoke. He goes out into the hallway and sees a fire, so he fills a trash can from his room with water and douses the fire. He goes back to bed.
Later, the physicist wakes up and smells smoke. He opens his door and sees a fire in the hallway. He walks down the hall to a fire hose and after calculating the flame velocity, distance, water pressure, trajectory, etc. extinguishes the fire with the minimum amount of water and energy needed.
Later, the mathematician wakes up and smells smoke. He goes to the hall, sees the fire and then the fire hose. He thinks for a moment and then exclaims, "Ah, a solution exists!" and then goes back to bed.
Hey Ap, love your work, and i am not being a lick, here is my hotel joke/wit: An engineer, physicist & mathematician in a hotel An engineer, a physicist and a mathematician are staying in a hotel.
The engineer wakes up and smells smoke. He goes out into the hallway and sees a fire, so he fills a trash can from his room with water and douses the fire. He goes back to bed.
Later, the physicist wakes up and smells smoke. He opens his door and sees a fire in the hallway. He walks down the hall to a fire hose and after calculating the flame velocity, distance, water pressure, trajectory, etc. extinguishes the fire with the minimum amount of water and energy needed.
Later, the mathematician wakes up and smells smoke. He goes to the hall, sees the fire and then the fire hose. He thinks for a moment and then exclaims, "Ah, a solution exists!" and then goes back to bed.
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webby
New Member
Posts โข 136
Likes โข 0
February 2008
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Spreading sum Chrimbo cheer... free ltd ed cards, by webby on Dec 15, 2009 14:40:36 GMT 1, or, one for your cards....................
Because of back problems, each night I lie on the floor and do exercises. Once when we stopped at a motel, as I started my exercise, something under the bed caught my eye. It was a card, on which was written "Yes, we do clean under here, too."
or, one for your cards....................
Because of back problems, each night I lie on the floor and do exercises. Once when we stopped at a motel, as I started my exercise, something under the bed caught my eye. It was a card, on which was written "Yes, we do clean under here, too."
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webby
New Member
Posts โข 136
Likes โข 0
February 2008
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Spreading sum Chrimbo cheer... free ltd ed cards, by webby on Dec 15, 2009 14:50:33 GMT 1, more of a joke for Eine;
What do elves learn in school? The Elf-abet!
Shall i give up??
more of a joke for Eine;
What do elves learn in school? The Elf-abet!
Shall i give up??
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Young Squire
New Member
Posts โข 577
Likes โข 130
May 2007
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Spreading sum Chrimbo cheer... free ltd ed cards, by Young Squire on Dec 15, 2009 15:00:16 GMT 1, Q: Why did the pigeon cross the road?
A: Because it thought it was a chicken. ;D
Happy christmas AP, nice work with the cards.
Q: Why did the pigeon cross the road?
A: Because it thought it was a chicken. ;D
Happy christmas AP, nice work with the cards.
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webby
New Member
Posts โข 136
Likes โข 0
February 2008
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Spreading sum Chrimbo cheer... free ltd ed cards, by webby on Dec 15, 2009 15:01:02 GMT 1, one for bird lovers............
I was driving to work this morning when my car stalled in the damp weather. I was sitting in the car at the side of the highway, contemplating my next move, when a pigeon flew down and landed right in the middle of the hood of the car.
It seemed fairly tame, and I soon became fascinated in watching it up close as it strutted around and made cooing noises.
A few minutes passed, and two more pigeons flew in and joined the first bird. Pigeons seem to be attracted by crowds, and soon I was sitting there with a whole hood full of pigeons, all cooing loudly and beginning to change the color of my hood.
Gradually I noticed that the birds seemed to be trying to get my attention, which was unnerving, since I had always regarded pigeons as rather stupid birds. But, sure enough, several of them were dragging a piece of rope around on the hood, and several others were flying out in front of the car and returning to the hood.
All of a sudden, I realized what they were doing, so I yanked open the door and wildly chased them all off.
No way was I going to be pigeon towed!
I am here all night!!!
one for bird lovers............
I was driving to work this morning when my car stalled in the damp weather. I was sitting in the car at the side of the highway, contemplating my next move, when a pigeon flew down and landed right in the middle of the hood of the car.
It seemed fairly tame, and I soon became fascinated in watching it up close as it strutted around and made cooing noises.
A few minutes passed, and two more pigeons flew in and joined the first bird. Pigeons seem to be attracted by crowds, and soon I was sitting there with a whole hood full of pigeons, all cooing loudly and beginning to change the color of my hood.
Gradually I noticed that the birds seemed to be trying to get my attention, which was unnerving, since I had always regarded pigeons as rather stupid birds. But, sure enough, several of them were dragging a piece of rope around on the hood, and several others were flying out in front of the car and returning to the hood.
All of a sudden, I realized what they were doing, so I yanked open the door and wildly chased them all off.
No way was I going to be pigeon towed!
I am here all night!!!
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webby
New Member
Posts โข 136
Likes โข 0
February 2008
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Spreading sum Chrimbo cheer... free ltd ed cards, by webby on Dec 15, 2009 15:01:46 GMT 1, AP, You are a better man and artist than Banksy, HAPPY XMAS!!
AP, You are a better man and artist than Banksy, HAPPY XMAS!!
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Young Squire
New Member
Posts โข 577
Likes โข 130
May 2007
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Spreading sum Chrimbo cheer... free ltd ed cards, by Young Squire on Dec 15, 2009 15:01:57 GMT 1, Q: Why did the pigeon cross the road? A: Because it thought it was a chicken. ;D Happy christmas AP, nice work with the cards.
Sorry that was lame! How about something more topical:
Q: Whatโs the difference between Investment Bankers and London Pigeons?
A: The Pigeons are still capable of making deposits on new BMWs
Q: Why did the pigeon cross the road? A: Because it thought it was a chicken. ;D Happy christmas AP, nice work with the cards. Sorry that was lame! How about something more topical: Q: Whatโs the difference between Investment Bankers and London Pigeons? A: The Pigeons are still capable of making deposits on new BMWs
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webby
New Member
Posts โข 136
Likes โข 0
February 2008
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Spreading sum Chrimbo cheer... free ltd ed cards, by webby on Dec 15, 2009 15:05:57 GMT 1, Youngsquire: Nice one,
Last one from me..........
Why is a sofa like a roast chicken ? Because they're both full of stuffing !
Youngsquire: Nice one,
Last one from me..........
Why is a sofa like a roast chicken ? Because they're both full of stuffing !
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marwood
New Member
Posts โข 102
Likes โข 5
June 2009
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Spreading sum Chrimbo cheer... free ltd ed cards, by marwood on Dec 15, 2009 15:07:14 GMT 1, Makes me think of that classic Fawlty Towers episode...
"Que? Pig? Oink oink, oink oink.... hahahahah!!!"
"Not pig, PIGEON!! You have pigeons in Spain, or did Franco hace them all shot?"
;D
Love a pigeon bomber if there's still one going.....
Makes me think of that classic Fawlty Towers episode...
"Que? Pig? Oink oink, oink oink.... hahahahah!!!"
"Not pig, PIGEON!! You have pigeons in Spain, or did Franco hace them all shot?"
;D
Love a pigeon bomber if there's still one going.....
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Spreading sum Chrimbo cheer... free ltd ed cards, by bazzj04 on Dec 15, 2009 15:07:34 GMT 1, Hi AP , any chance of one of these too please , good work man ,
Hi AP , any chance of one of these too please , good work man ,
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Spreading sum Chrimbo cheer... free ltd ed cards, by bazzj04 on Dec 15, 2009 15:09:49 GMT 1, Pigeons are great i agree
Pigeons are great i agree
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Urban Cowboy
New Member
Posts โข 658
Likes โข 58
December 2008
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Spreading sum Chrimbo cheer... free ltd ed cards, by Urban Cowboy on Dec 15, 2009 15:15:26 GMT 1, My favourite joke of the last week or so, do I win a prize
Ed went to see the Doctor. The Doctor asked what was wrong. "Don't laugh!" said the patient Ed. "Of course I won't laugh," the doctor said. "I'm a professional. In over twenty years I've never laughed at a patient". "Okay then," Ed said, and proceeded to drop his trousers, revealing the smallest willy the doctor had ever seen. It couldn't have been bigger than the size of a AAA battery. Unable to control himself, the doctor started giggling, then fell laughing to the floor. Ten minutes later he was able to struggle to his feet and regain his composure. "I'm so sorry," said the doctor. "I really am. I don't know what came over me. On my honour as a doctor and a gentleman, I promise it won't happen again. Now what seems to be the problem?" "It's swollen," Ed replied.
My favourite joke of the last week or so, do I win a prize
Ed went to see the Doctor. The Doctor asked what was wrong. "Don't laugh!" said the patient Ed. "Of course I won't laugh," the doctor said. "I'm a professional. In over twenty years I've never laughed at a patient". "Okay then," Ed said, and proceeded to drop his trousers, revealing the smallest willy the doctor had ever seen. It couldn't have been bigger than the size of a AAA battery. Unable to control himself, the doctor started giggling, then fell laughing to the floor. Ten minutes later he was able to struggle to his feet and regain his composure. "I'm so sorry," said the doctor. "I really am. I don't know what came over me. On my honour as a doctor and a gentleman, I promise it won't happen again. Now what seems to be the problem?" "It's swollen," Ed replied.
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Spreading sum Chrimbo cheer... free ltd ed cards, by bazzj04 on Dec 15, 2009 15:23:14 GMT 1, Q: Who's the nicest man in a hospital? A: The ultra-sound man
Q: Who's the nicest man in a hospital? A: The ultra-sound man
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spirit
Junior Member
Posts โข 2,956
Likes โข 516
August 2007
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Spreading sum Chrimbo cheer... free ltd ed cards, by spirit on Dec 15, 2009 15:28:41 GMT 1, Patient: Doctor, I have this insatiable urge to wrap myself in clingfilm
Doctor: I can clearly see your nuts
Patient: Doctor, I have this insatiable urge to wrap myself in clingfilm
Doctor: I can clearly see your nuts
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tobomoore
New Member
Posts โข 148
Likes โข 82
February 2009
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Spreading sum Chrimbo cheer... free ltd ed cards, by tobomoore on Dec 15, 2009 15:37:04 GMT 1, A man is in a queue at Tesco and sees this busty blonde staring at him, he cant believe she is staring at him, then she starts waving. "Excuse me do I know you" he asks.
"Yes I think you are the father of one of my kids" she says.
The man thinks back and remembers his one act of infedelity and says " ****ing hell are you the bird I shagged on me stag do, whilst your mate whipped me and your other mate stuck a brush up my arse"
"No" she replies "I am your sons English teacher!"
Id love the pigeon if theres still one going - happy xmas :-)
A man is in a queue at Tesco and sees this busty blonde staring at him, he cant believe she is staring at him, then she starts waving. "Excuse me do I know you" he asks.
"Yes I think you are the father of one of my kids" she says.
The man thinks back and remembers his one act of infedelity and says " ****ing hell are you the bird I shagged on me stag do, whilst your mate whipped me and your other mate stuck a brush up my arse"
"No" she replies "I am your sons English teacher!"
Id love the pigeon if theres still one going - happy xmas :-)
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Spreading sum Chrimbo cheer... free ltd ed cards, by Agent Provocateur on Dec 15, 2009 15:41:25 GMT 1, Haha love'em... keep them coming.
Webby you're in, bazz you're already on my mailing list for one, youngsquire and urbancowboy you're down for a 'No Room...' plus last but not least marwood you're down for a 'Biggles'.
Hope that's all cool... three 'Biggles' and four 'No Room...' left.
Haha love'em... keep them coming. Webby you're in, bazz you're already on my mailing list for one, youngsquire and urbancowboy you're down for a 'No Room...' plus last but not least marwood you're down for a 'Biggles'. Hope that's all cool... three 'Biggles' and four 'No Room...' left.
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Spreading sum Chrimbo cheer... free ltd ed cards, by Agent Provocateur on Dec 15, 2009 15:43:19 GMT 1, That's cool tobomoore... two 'Biggles' left now
That's cool tobomoore... two 'Biggles' left now
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Ottomatik
Junior Member
Posts โข 4,212
Likes โข 2,451
March 2009
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Spreading sum Chrimbo cheer... free ltd ed cards, by Ottomatik on Dec 15, 2009 15:49:14 GMT 1, To the AP's, it's Christmastime, there's no need to be afraid. it's Christmastime, looks like Banksy & POW are getting paid. it's Christmastime, no cookies have been made. It's Christmastime, please Santa, let us all get laid!
Happy Holidays everyone.
(pigeon bomber plz!)
To the AP's, it's Christmastime, there's no need to be afraid. it's Christmastime, looks like Banksy & POW are getting paid. it's Christmastime, no cookies have been made. It's Christmastime, please Santa, let us all get laid!
Happy Holidays everyone.
(pigeon bomber plz!)
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Spreading sum Chrimbo cheer... free ltd ed cards, by Agent Provocateur on Dec 15, 2009 15:55:57 GMT 1, No worries otto
Final 'Biggles' feeling a bit unloved... and four 'No Room...' waiting to be claimed!
No worries otto
Final 'Biggles' feeling a bit unloved... and four 'No Room...' waiting to be claimed!
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robinbanks
Junior Member
Posts โข 1,319
Likes โข 2
October 2007
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Spreading sum Chrimbo cheer... free ltd ed cards, by robinbanks on Dec 15, 2009 16:03:59 GMT 1, Q: Who's the nicest man in a hospital? A: The ultra-sound man
Haha - except when he's not working eh - then it's the hip replacement guy! ;D
A fan of the old jokes home too I see
Q: Who's the nicest man in a hospital? A: The ultra-sound man Haha - except when he's not working eh - then it's the hip replacement guy! ;D A fan of the old jokes home too I see
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stenev
New Member
Posts โข 560
Likes โข 36
December 2009
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Spreading sum Chrimbo cheer... free ltd ed cards, by stenev on Dec 15, 2009 16:09:13 GMT 1, No worries otto Final 'Biggles' feeling a bit unloved... and four 'No Room...' waiting to be claimed!
Would love the last Biggles, but happy to go to the back of the list if a seasoned forum member wants it.
How many Freudian analysts does it take to change a lightbulb?
2...
1 to change the bulb and the other to hold the p***s. I mean ladder.
No worries otto Final 'Biggles' feeling a bit unloved... and four 'No Room...' waiting to be claimed! Would love the last Biggles, but happy to go to the back of the list if a seasoned forum member wants it. How many Freudian analysts does it take to change a lightbulb? 2... 1 to change the bulb and the other to hold the p***s. I mean ladder.
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Spreading sum Chrimbo cheer... free ltd ed cards, by Agent Provocateur on Dec 15, 2009 17:41:46 GMT 1, I've just pm'd everyone on the list so far to get addresses.
Still a few 'No Room at the Holiday Inn' available...
I've just pm'd everyone on the list so far to get addresses.
Still a few 'No Room at the Holiday Inn' available...
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illu
Junior Member
Posts โข 1,849
Likes โข 366
December 2009
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Spreading sum Chrimbo cheer... free ltd ed cards, by illu on Dec 15, 2009 18:04:46 GMT 1, Heyho, just got my eyeballs out of youNoob! for a funkyass**t chrismascard I offer my first post ever in this forum. You don't have time to spray my moms christmastree so I don't get eyecancer this year? So feel free to enlighten my boredom in the black forest.......and by the way: A one handed man enters a secon hand shop. I wish you an peacefull christmas!
cheerio miss sophie!
olli
Heyho, just got my eyeballs out of youNoob! for a funkyass**t chrismascard I offer my first post ever in this forum. You don't have time to spray my moms christmastree so I don't get eyecancer this year? So feel free to enlighten my boredom in the black forest.......and by the way: A one handed man enters a secon hand shop. I wish you an peacefull christmas!
cheerio miss sophie!
olli
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Spreading sum Chrimbo cheer... free ltd ed cards, by Agent Provocateur on Dec 16, 2009 9:59:57 GMT 1, Morning, thanks to everyone that's pm'd their address, I am on the case today. Still a few more to come tho.
olli welcome to the forum, your first post get's you one of my festive freebies I'll pm you for your delivery details later.
AP
Morning, thanks to everyone that's pm'd their address, I am on the case today. Still a few more to come tho. olli welcome to the forum, your first post get's you one of my festive freebies I'll pm you for your delivery details later. AP
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ninja
New Member
Posts โข 467
Likes โข 18
August 2007
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Spreading sum Chrimbo cheer... free ltd ed cards, by ninja on Dec 16, 2009 14:21:07 GMT 1, I've already got one but a mate sent me this joke when I was growing a mouser for Mo'vember last month:
An eskimo brings his snowmobile in to the garage because it isn't running well.
The mechanic inspects the engine then looks at the eskimo and says 'it looks like you blew a seal'...
To which the eskimo replies 'NO... that's just frost on my moustache!'
I've already got one but a mate sent me this joke when I was growing a mouser for Mo'vember last month:
An eskimo brings his snowmobile in to the garage because it isn't running well.
The mechanic inspects the engine then looks at the eskimo and says 'it looks like you blew a seal'...
To which the eskimo replies 'NO... that's just frost on my moustache!'
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Spreading sum Chrimbo cheer... free ltd ed cards, by thegreatarchitect on Dec 16, 2009 14:54:21 GMT 1, Classy piece that bomber pigeion AP Your inspiration behind it reminds me of Max Ernst LOPLOP bird only completely different if that makes any sense ?
Classy piece that bomber pigeion AP Your inspiration behind it reminds me of Max Ernst LOPLOP bird only completely different if that makes any sense ?
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Spreading sum Chrimbo cheer... free ltd ed cards, by Agent Provocateur on Dec 16, 2009 16:09:16 GMT 1, donaldo that's awful(ly good) ;D
Thanks Mr Architect... I better get onto Google as I don't know Max Ernst's LopLop bird. Am intrigued!
I have got all but two of the addresses for Biggles and will be dropping them in the post box in a minute. Let me know if they arrive
Thanks for the pm's for the 'No Room at the Holiday', I'll hopefully sort all of them out tomorrow... off to Sickboy's logopop exhibition tonight
Laters
donaldo that's awful(ly good) ;D Thanks Mr Architect... I better get onto Google as I don't know Max Ernst's LopLop bird. Am intrigued! I have got all but two of the addresses for Biggles and will be dropping them in the post box in a minute. Let me know if they arrive Thanks for the pm's for the 'No Room at the Holiday', I'll hopefully sort all of them out tomorrow... off to Sickboy's logopop exhibition tonight Laters
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Deleted
Posts โข 0
Likes โข
January 1970
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Spreading sum Chrimbo cheer... free ltd ed cards, by Deleted on Dec 16, 2009 19:41:23 GMT 1, Very interesting read - Mr Biggles - Surreal and an out of the box different kettle of ballgame way of thinking AP. Like it and the card looks great
Very interesting read - Mr Biggles - Surreal and an out of the box different kettle of ballgame way of thinking AP. Like it and the card looks great
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Spreading sum Chrimbo cheer... free ltd ed cards, by Agent Provocateur on Dec 17, 2009 13:43:25 GMT 1, Thanks Cartrain, haven't got a clue what it says about my mental stability tho! Here's a version I did on a great piece of reclaimed wood (but keep it quite, I probably shouldn't be posting it on here ).
I've got all the 'No Room...' addresses sorted so they should be in the mail tomorrow some time, fingers crossed.
Thanks Cartrain, haven't got a clue what it says about my mental stability tho! Here's a version I did on a great piece of reclaimed wood (but keep it quite, I probably shouldn't be posting it on here ). I've got all the 'No Room...' addresses sorted so they should be in the mail tomorrow some time, fingers crossed.
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