Richard
Junior Member
Posts โข 1,351
Likes โข 178
September 2007
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Trisha.info, by Richard on Dec 20, 2007 19:56:22 GMT 1, Since when has Banksy.info become Trisha.info?!?!
I think everyone needs to take a step back and breathe!
Right, I will lighten the mood with a joke!
A businessman met a beautiful girl and agreed to spend the afternoon with her for ยฃ500. They did their thing, and, before he left, he told her that he did not have any cash with him, but he would have his secretary write a check and mail it to her, calling the payment โRENT FOR APARTMENT.โ
On the way to the office he regretted what he had done, realizing that the whole event had not been worth the price So he had his secretary send a check for ยฃ250 and enclose the following typed note:
โDear Madam:
Enclosed find check in the amount of ยฃ250 for rent of your apartment. I am not sending the amount agreed upon, because when I rented the place, I was under the impression that:
#1 - it had never been occupied; #2 - there was plenty of heat; and #3 - it was small enough to make me feel cozy and at home.
However, I found out that it had been previously occupied, that there wasnโt any heat, and that it was entirely too large.โ
Upon receipt of the note, the girl immediately returned the check for ยฃ250 with the following note :
โDear Sir:
First of all, I cannot understand how you could expect a beautiful apartment to remain unoccupied indefinitely. As for the heat, there is plenty of it, if you know how to turn it on. Regarding the space, the apartment is indeed of regular size, but if you donโt have enough furniture to fill it, please do not blame the management.
Please send the rent in full or we will be forced to contact your present landlady.โ
Now...who's get a better one? (I know it's not too hard!)
Since when has Banksy.info become Trisha.info?!?!
I think everyone needs to take a step back and breathe!
Right, I will lighten the mood with a joke!
A businessman met a beautiful girl and agreed to spend the afternoon with her for ยฃ500. They did their thing, and, before he left, he told her that he did not have any cash with him, but he would have his secretary write a check and mail it to her, calling the payment โRENT FOR APARTMENT.โ
On the way to the office he regretted what he had done, realizing that the whole event had not been worth the price So he had his secretary send a check for ยฃ250 and enclose the following typed note:
โDear Madam:
Enclosed find check in the amount of ยฃ250 for rent of your apartment. I am not sending the amount agreed upon, because when I rented the place, I was under the impression that:
#1 - it had never been occupied; #2 - there was plenty of heat; and #3 - it was small enough to make me feel cozy and at home.
However, I found out that it had been previously occupied, that there wasnโt any heat, and that it was entirely too large.โ
Upon receipt of the note, the girl immediately returned the check for ยฃ250 with the following note :
โDear Sir:
First of all, I cannot understand how you could expect a beautiful apartment to remain unoccupied indefinitely. As for the heat, there is plenty of it, if you know how to turn it on. Regarding the space, the apartment is indeed of regular size, but if you donโt have enough furniture to fill it, please do not blame the management.
Please send the rent in full or we will be forced to contact your present landlady.โ
Now...who's get a better one? (I know it's not too hard!)
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bill
New Member
Posts โข 444
Likes โข 0
November 2007
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Trisha.info, by bill on Dec 20, 2007 20:04:15 GMT 1, ha ha... that was good!~
ha ha... that was good!~
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dotdot
Junior Member
Posts โข 3,647
Likes โข 1,027
December 2006
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Trisha.info, by dotdot on Dec 20, 2007 20:14:46 GMT 1, For every Trisha there's a Jerry Sadowitz waiting in the wings....
keep it R e a l - not Reality !!!
..
For every Trisha there's a Jerry Sadowitz waiting in the wings....
keep it R e a l - not Reality !!!
..
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Richard
Junior Member
Posts โข 1,351
Likes โข 178
September 2007
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Trisha.info, by Richard on Dec 20, 2007 20:38:48 GMT 1, Come on guys - where is the Chrismtas spirit?! Get your jokes out for the lads Part I.
Come on guys - where is the Chrismtas spirit?! Get your jokes out for the lads Part I.
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frank11
Junior Member
Posts โข 1,190
Likes โข 2
September 2006
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Trisha.info, by frank11 on Dec 20, 2007 20:43:38 GMT 1, Come on guys - where is the Chrismtas spirit?! Get your jokes out for the lads Part I.
what is orange and sounds like a Parrot?
A Carrot ;D Made me laugh ;D
Come on guys - where is the Chrismtas spirit?! Get your jokes out for the lads Part I. what is orange and sounds like a Parrot? A Carrot ;D Made me laugh ;D
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shower
Junior Member
Posts โข 1,543
Likes โข 23
September 2007
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Trisha.info, by shower on Dec 20, 2007 20:50:50 GMT 1, last year i bought my wife a water bed...
...and she drank it all! she calls my side the dead sea and i call hers the artic circle. its a shame because since we got it we have just been drifting apart!
last year i bought my wife a water bed...
...and she drank it all! she calls my side the dead sea and i call hers the artic circle. its a shame because since we got it we have just been drifting apart!
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BK83
Junior Member
Posts โข 1,604
Likes โข 10
October 2006
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Trisha.info, by BK83 on Dec 21, 2007 6:35:24 GMT 1, A mushroom walks into a bar, sits down and orders a drink; to which the bartender replies "sorry, we don't serve your kind here." The mushroom looks up bewildered, and asks "why not? I'm a fungi !! "
A mushroom walks into a bar, sits down and orders a drink; to which the bartender replies "sorry, we don't serve your kind here." The mushroom looks up bewildered, and asks "why not? I'm a fungi !! "
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BME
New Member
Posts โข 799
Likes โข 74
December 2006
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Trisha.info, by BME on Dec 21, 2007 6:48:08 GMT 1, Q. What do you call a dog that can't hear?
A. It doesn't matter, it can't hear.
Q. What do you call a dog that can't hear? A. It doesn't matter, it can't hear.
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CHAMB
Artist
New Member
Posts โข 190
Likes โข 3
December 2006
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Trisha.info, by CHAMB on Dec 21, 2007 7:21:58 GMT 1, My friend asked me if I wanted a frozen bannana and I said No... But then I thought about it and wanted a regular bannana for later so i said yes..
My friend asked me if I wanted a frozen bannana and I said No... But then I thought about it and wanted a regular bannana for later so i said yes..
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dmandpenfold
Junior Member
Posts โข 2,466
Likes โข 10
December 2006
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Trisha.info, by dmandpenfold on Dec 21, 2007 9:42:15 GMT 1, a tortoise walks into a bar at christmas, the bartender says "sorry we dont serve your kind". "What do you mean" says the tortoise, "i just came in for a quiet drink" "Sorry it's the rules no pets or animals allowed" replied the bartender "oh go on" says the tortoise, "just one, i'll be really quiet" The bar tender replies "no i cant do it, more than my jobs worth, now i'm going to have to ask you to leave or will throw you out" "Well that's not very kind sir" replied the tortoise, " i just came in for a quiet half, no trouble and you wont give me a chance" "Right that's it" said the bartender, "i'm throwing you out" and with that he picks up the tortoise and chucks him out the door.
Anyway the following christmas comes and the tortoise walks through the door again and says "what did you do that for?"
a tortoise walks into a bar at christmas, the bartender says "sorry we dont serve your kind". "What do you mean" says the tortoise, "i just came in for a quiet drink" "Sorry it's the rules no pets or animals allowed" replied the bartender "oh go on" says the tortoise, "just one, i'll be really quiet" The bar tender replies "no i cant do it, more than my jobs worth, now i'm going to have to ask you to leave or will throw you out" "Well that's not very kind sir" replied the tortoise, " i just came in for a quiet half, no trouble and you wont give me a chance" "Right that's it" said the bartender, "i'm throwing you out" and with that he picks up the tortoise and chucks him out the door. Anyway the following christmas comes and the tortoise walks through the door again and says "what did you do that for?"
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robinbanks
Junior Member
Posts โข 1,319
Likes โข 2
October 2007
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Trisha.info, by robinbanks on Dec 21, 2007 10:18:49 GMT 1, Little Johnny runs into the kitchen and says to his mum "Mummy, mummy, grandma's got a prawn". His mum replies "Don't be silly Johnny, you know Grandma can't have seafood". But Johnny persists "Mummy, Grandma has got a prawn - she has!". Johnny grabs his mum by the hand and takes her into the living room to show Grandma asleep on the sofa, completely starkers, legs akimbo. Johnny points to Grandma's clitoris and says "See, I told you she had a prawn". Mum, slightly embarrassed, replies "Johnny, that's not a prawn. That's Grandma's clitoris." To which Johnny responds "Well it tastes like a prawn."
Little Johnny runs into the kitchen and says to his mum "Mummy, mummy, grandma's got a prawn". His mum replies "Don't be silly Johnny, you know Grandma can't have seafood". But Johnny persists "Mummy, Grandma has got a prawn - she has!". Johnny grabs his mum by the hand and takes her into the living room to show Grandma asleep on the sofa, completely starkers, legs akimbo. Johnny points to Grandma's clitoris and says "See, I told you she had a prawn". Mum, slightly embarrassed, replies "Johnny, that's not a prawn. That's Grandma's clitoris." To which Johnny responds "Well it tastes like a prawn."
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Richard
Junior Member
Posts โข 1,351
Likes โข 178
September 2007
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Trisha.info, by Richard on Dec 21, 2007 10:40:10 GMT 1, AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! That couldn't be funnier.
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! That couldn't be funnier.
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dmandpenfold
Junior Member
Posts โข 2,466
Likes โข 10
December 2006
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Trisha.info, by dmandpenfold on Dec 21, 2007 10:44:28 GMT 1, Little Johnny runs into the kitchen and says to his mum "Mummy, mummy, grandma's got a prawn". His mum replies "Don't be silly Johnny, you know Grandma can't have seafood". But Johnny persists "Mummy, Grandma has got a prawn - she has!". Johnny grabs his mum by the hand and takes her into the living room to show Grandma asleep on the sofa, completely starkers, legs akimbo. Johnny points to Grandma's clitoris and says "See, I told you she had a prawn". Mum, slightly embarrassed, replies "Johnny, that's not a prawn. That's Grandma's clitoris." To which Johnny responds "Well it tastes like a prawn."
;D ;D ;D
Little Johnny runs into the kitchen and says to his mum "Mummy, mummy, grandma's got a prawn". His mum replies "Don't be silly Johnny, you know Grandma can't have seafood". But Johnny persists "Mummy, Grandma has got a prawn - she has!". Johnny grabs his mum by the hand and takes her into the living room to show Grandma asleep on the sofa, completely starkers, legs akimbo. Johnny points to Grandma's clitoris and says "See, I told you she had a prawn". Mum, slightly embarrassed, replies "Johnny, that's not a prawn. That's Grandma's clitoris." To which Johnny responds "Well it tastes like a prawn." ;D ;D ;D
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dmandpenfold
Junior Member
Posts โข 2,466
Likes โข 10
December 2006
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Trisha.info, by dmandpenfold on Dec 21, 2007 11:17:57 GMT 1, more tortoises...
what does a snail riding the back of a tortoise say??
whoa, wahaaay , whooaaaa boy easy, whoop-whoop
coat, taxi....screech
more tortoises...
what does a snail riding the back of a tortoise say??
whoa, wahaaay , whooaaaa boy easy, whoop-whoop
coat, taxi....screech
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robinbanks
Junior Member
Posts โข 1,319
Likes โข 2
October 2007
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Trisha.info, by robinbanks on Dec 16, 2008 11:46:12 GMT 1, Once again the forum and it's members seems to be suffering from PBRT (Post Banksy Release Tension) and so I thought it might be a good time to dig up an old and amusing thread from this time last year when, funnily enough, we were all experiencing similar symptoms...
and on that note, here's my contribution...
A man walk's in to the doctor's complaining of an ear infection. "What are the symptoms?" the doctor enquires. To which the man responds, "they're those yellow people on TV."
boom boom ;D
Come on now people - you must be able to do better than that?
Once again the forum and it's members seems to be suffering from PBRT (Post Banksy Release Tension) and so I thought it might be a good time to dig up an old and amusing thread from this time last year when, funnily enough, we were all experiencing similar symptoms...
and on that note, here's my contribution...
A man walk's in to the doctor's complaining of an ear infection. "What are the symptoms?" the doctor enquires. To which the man responds, "they're those yellow people on TV."
boom boom ;D
Come on now people - you must be able to do better than that?
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Trisha.info, by hero on Dec 16, 2008 11:48:19 GMT 1, What you don't know can't hurt you, or so we're told. This morning I didn't know that a wasp had crawled into my slipper, and it hurt me a great deal
What you don't know can't hurt you, or so we're told. This morning I didn't know that a wasp had crawled into my slipper, and it hurt me a great deal
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hupster
New Member
Posts โข 608
Likes โข 195
December 2007
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Trisha.info, by hupster on Dec 16, 2008 11:48:21 GMT 1, Once again the forum and it's members seems to be suffering from PBRT (Post Banksy Release Tension) and so I thought it might be a good time to dig up an old and amusing thread from this time last year when, funnily enough, we were all experiencing similar symptoms... and on that note, here's my contribution... A man walk's in to the doctor's complaining of an ear infection. "What are the symptoms?" the doctor enquires. To which the man responds, "they're those yellow people on TV." boom boom ;D Come on now people - you must be able to do better than that?
What do you call a sheep with no legs.....
a cloud.....
ill get me coat me thinks ;D ;D
Once again the forum and it's members seems to be suffering from PBRT (Post Banksy Release Tension) and so I thought it might be a good time to dig up an old and amusing thread from this time last year when, funnily enough, we were all experiencing similar symptoms... and on that note, here's my contribution... A man walk's in to the doctor's complaining of an ear infection. "What are the symptoms?" the doctor enquires. To which the man responds, "they're those yellow people on TV." boom boom ;D Come on now people - you must be able to do better than that? What do you call a sheep with no legs..... a cloud..... ill get me coat me thinks ;D ;D
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bullet
Blank Rank
Posts โข 0
Likes โข 16
January 2013
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Trisha.info, by bullet on Dec 16, 2008 11:48:30 GMT 1, personally i think the forum should close down for a few days to give it a rest and perhaps people might go away and come back looking at things differently
personally i think the forum should close down for a few days to give it a rest and perhaps people might go away and come back looking at things differently
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robinbanks
Junior Member
Posts โข 1,319
Likes โข 2
October 2007
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Trisha.info, by robinbanks on Dec 16, 2008 11:53:42 GMT 1, Kylie Minogue, Elton John and Robbie Williams are walking along the street. Suddenly Kylie trips, falls forwards and jams her head between some railings. Robbie, quick as a flash, pulls down her knickers and does her up the wrong un. He turns to Elton and says, "your turn!" but Elton starts to cry.
"What's wrong, Elton?" asks Robbie.
Elton sobs, "My head won't fit through the railings!"
Kylie Minogue, Elton John and Robbie Williams are walking along the street. Suddenly Kylie trips, falls forwards and jams her head between some railings. Robbie, quick as a flash, pulls down her knickers and does her up the wrong un. He turns to Elton and says, "your turn!" but Elton starts to cry.
"What's wrong, Elton?" asks Robbie.
Elton sobs, "My head won't fit through the railings!"
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robinbanks
Junior Member
Posts โข 1,319
Likes โข 2
October 2007
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Trisha.info, by robinbanks on Dec 16, 2008 12:07:07 GMT 1, A couple of New Jersey hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn't seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head.
The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: "My friend is dead! What can I do?"
The operator, in a calm soothing voice says: "Just take it easy. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead."
There is a silence, then a shot is heard. The guy's voice comes back on the line. He says: "OK, now what?"
A couple of New Jersey hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn't seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head.
The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: "My friend is dead! What can I do?"
The operator, in a calm soothing voice says: "Just take it easy. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead."
There is a silence, then a shot is heard. The guy's voice comes back on the line. He says: "OK, now what?"
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Trisha.info, by hero on Dec 16, 2008 12:09:12 GMT 1, My wife recently found out she suffers from both diabetes and hayfever. I have tried to cheer her up by sending gifts, you know; flowers, chocolates.
H
My wife recently found out she suffers from both diabetes and hayfever. I have tried to cheer her up by sending gifts, you know; flowers, chocolates.
H
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Cocteau 101
Junior Member
Posts โข 3,483
Likes โข 1,202
January 2007
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Trisha.info, by Cocteau 101 on Dec 16, 2008 12:09:15 GMT 1, Why did the pie cross the road?
because it was Meat N potato
Why did the pie cross the road?
because it was Meat N potato
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funster
Junior Member
Posts โข 2,256
Likes โข 0
October 2006
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Trisha.info, by funster on Dec 16, 2008 12:12:19 GMT 1, RBs on fine form
RBs on fine form
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Trisha.info, by alsbabar on Dec 16, 2008 12:14:28 GMT 1, If you need help, just say Rice and Peas
If you need help, just say Rice and Peas
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hupster
New Member
Posts โข 608
Likes โข 195
December 2007
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Trisha.info, by hupster on Dec 16, 2008 12:16:11 GMT 1, I brought an advent calender from woolworths today, all the windows were boarded up and theres feckall nside... ;D ;D ;D
Hupster
I brought an advent calender from woolworths today, all the windows were boarded up and theres feckall nside... ;D ;D ;D
Hupster
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robinbanks
Junior Member
Posts โข 1,319
Likes โข 2
October 2007
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Trisha.info, by robinbanks on Dec 16, 2008 12:18:39 GMT 1, kiss me teeth ;D
kiss me teeth ;D
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robinbanks
Junior Member
Posts โข 1,319
Likes โข 2
October 2007
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Trisha.info, by robinbanks on Dec 16, 2008 12:27:21 GMT 1, ^^^^^^^Haha - that is pish funny!!^^^^^^^
What's the difference between Gordon Ramsey and fell running?
Fell running is a pant in the country...
^^^^^^^Haha - that is pish funny!!^^^^^^^
What's the difference between Gordon Ramsey and fell running?
Fell running is a pant in the country...
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robinbanks
Junior Member
Posts โข 1,319
Likes โข 2
October 2007
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Trisha.info, by robinbanks on Dec 16, 2008 12:29:11 GMT 1, What's the difference between Evil Kneivel and Jennifer Lopez?
Evil Kneivel has a cunning stunt...
What's the difference between Evil Kneivel and Jennifer Lopez?
Evil Kneivel has a cunning stunt...
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ashby
New Member
Posts โข 114
Likes โข 1
February 2008
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Trisha.info, by ashby on Dec 16, 2008 12:36:08 GMT 1, What's an Essex girls favourite Wine?
'take me to Lakeside'
(it works better down the pub, than being read and yes it is about 20 years old)
What's an Essex girls favourite Wine?
'take me to Lakeside'
(it works better down the pub, than being read and yes it is about 20 years old)
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